Posted at 12.29.2018
An English article writer and politician, Eustace Budgell once said, "friendship is a strong and habitual inclination in two persons to promote the good and happiness of 1 another" (Addison, Steele, & Relationship, p. 300). This estimate is very true in what has been said and noticed about companionship throughout history. A friendly relationship is seen all over the place you look. Chances are someone channel browsing on on the tv set will likely find a TV show based on friendships. If you walk through the halls in colleges you will notice kids huddled together speaking and laughing with the friends; if you go to a workplace at lunchtime, it is likely you will notice co-workers eating mutually who have become friends through work. This newspaper will focus on male-male, female-female, and male-female friendships and how to keep up friendships. Bride-to-be Wars, I REALLY LIKE You, Man, and Valentines Day are movies that portray friendships, helping the idea that friendships are characterized in many ways, one of which is by gender, and also that camaraderie can be a confident experience in dealing with emotions and socializing.
There are many different types of friendships, whether it is work friends, college friends, or simply friends you have been close with for a while. Although each of these types of friendships are in various surroundings and contexts, virtually all friendships you may encounter will show some similar characteristics. Based on the textbook, Interpersonal Communications, friendships include five different characteristics: the partnership is voluntary, people are peers, the a friendly relationship is governed by rules, it may change by sex, and it has a life span. Friendships are voluntary because nobody is forced to have friends. If you are in a friendship with someone, you both are friends by choice. Along with being voluntary, the partnership must be taken care of through behaviours such as positivity, openness, and confidence. Friendships are also usually interactions between equals, or with peers. Therefore, it is a lot more difficult to form a friendship and be "friends" with your employer or your parents, because they exert an even of control over you. The next characteristic is that friendships are governed by rules. A few underlying rules of friendship involves trusting each other, keeping secrets, not being jealous of friends and family other friends, and providing emotional support. Furthermore, friendships have a life span. According to the textbook, most friendships will eventually end. This can be because they grow to dislike one another, or because friends' life circumstances can change. It might not exactly be because the friends actually want the companionship to get rid of, but it could just happen because they no longer have the necessary energy or time to maintain it. However, if a friend is of particular importance, communication (even if very nominal) with each other can keep it going (Floyd, 2009, p. 311-318).
Besides the characteristics listed above, many types of friendships derive from gender. It can be female-female, male-male, or male-female friendships, all of which is often very diverse friendships. Friendships among women often place better focus on conversational and mental expressiveness. Friendships among men concentrate on distributed activities and hobbies (Floyd, 2009, p. 314). Promoting this say, Aries and Johnson (1983), discovered females frequently discuss personal and family issues, have a great number of friends who live nearby, and talk on the phone often. However, men often enjoy speaking about things such as sports, similar hobbies, or doing shared activities. They discovered these exact things by examining a survey predicated on 136 parents (p. 1193-1194).
While there are multiple contrasting components to male-male and female-female friendships, there are also some similarities. Women and men agree on purposes of conversation in same-sex associations. Men and women endorse discussing for talk's sake as a main purpose of achieving up with friends. Next, they both concur that "task" is the second reason for ending up in friends. This means getting together to obtain a activity done, or talking about a task that they can be doing. The 3rd reason they both agree on for what is the purpose of discussing in their friendships is specific marriage issues (Duck & Wright, 1993, p. 7). To go along with these results, Duck and Wright also discovered that men and women are attuned to caring, supportiveness, and encouragement. However, women are more likely than men to express these exact things (p. 17).
There are two films specifically that portray each type of gender-based friendship that has been discussed thus far. Bride Wars is a movie about two young girls who've been best friends given that they were youngsters. Liv and Emma (enjoyed by Kate Hudson and Anne Hathaway), are both proposed to be hitched around the same time and both have imagined having their wedding ceremonies at the famous Plaza Hotel. Alas, the marriages were unintentionally booked on a single day, and Liv and Emma spend the majority of the movie struggling with the other person and hoping to sabotage each other's wedding ceremonies. By the end of the movie, visitors can tell that Liv and Emma are true friends, even though the movie depicts a whole lot of conflicts within their friendship.
Liv and Emma symbolize an ideal female-female companionship that complements every one of the characteristics discussed earlier in the paper. These are friends by choice. When they were young they became friends and thought we would stay friends throughout their lives and got always been there for each other. Their friendship was also governed by rules, which were extended to the limits during the movie. Keeping each other's secrets was especially examined at the end of the movie when a video tutorial of Emma dancing at spring chance was played while she was walking down the isle. It was not until soon after this event performed we begin to see Emma and Liv exert true companionship, portraying forgiveness. Emma forgave Liv and they were back again to being best friends, and eventually were pregnant for children that were due on a single day.
I Love You, Man is a funny in regards to a man, Peter (played out by Paul Rudd) who's involved to be married, but realizes that he does not have any male friends. He does not know who will operate in his wedding, and all of his fiance's friends are beginning to think he's weird because he's always around and has no male friends. Then fits his soon-to-be closest friend, Sydney (performed by Jason Segel) when Sydney poses as a prospective customer at an open up house (Peter is an agent). Each of them become almost inseparable, doing everything man close friends do; playing music in the "man cave, " occurring hikes with other folks friends, and heading to concerts to listen to their favorite strap Rush. Many of these things support the research that is done about male-male friendships. Sydney and Peter's romantic relationship was not developed around speaking about personal and family concerns, but by doing distributed activities, and through doing these things, they bonded. Not that they did not discuss anything personal. They reviewed things about Peter's life along with his fiance, Zoey, and discussed Sydney's past connections and family. Through all of this they formed a strong friendship, became close friends, and finally Sydney stood up as Peter's best man in his wedding.
Contrary to female-female and male-male friendships, cross love-making friendships (those between a man and female) need a whole other world of research because they are extremely different from same making love friendships. Though there are benefits to cross gender friendships, there can also be some issues that go with them. Cross love-making friendships can result in four different types of challenges described by Monsour, Harris, Kurzweil, and Beard (1994). The first obstacle is the mental bond challenge. Men and women have been trained since birth to look at the opposite love-making as a potential romantic partner so forming a a friendly relationship with someone can cause dilemma if one individual is looking at it is getting the capability of someday becoming romantic while they other person is simply looking for camaraderie. The next problem is the erotic challenge. For a few of the same reasons listed as challenges in the psychological bond, the erotic problem also confronts the idea that lots of individuals can sense a erotic pressure in their connections. The task is whether to act onto it or not. Functioning on it could lead to the start of a wonderful romantic relationship, or could be the end of any friendship. The third problem is the equality task. Because equality is an important element of a friendship, it sometimes causes issues between male-female friendships. It really is sometimes noticed that men may have male-dominance in friendships; this might cause problems because friendships do best if everyone treats one another as equals. Finally, the audience concern is the previous type of obstacle reviewed in cross-sex friendships. It really is sometimes difficult to explain to the external world the components and definition of a cross-sex camaraderie. Many outsiders do not believe that it can truly happenan identical friendship, without erotic interest, between a male and female. As a result of this, it's rather a challenge for both people within the a friendly relationship, especially if they are often influenced by the exterior world. (p. 56-57).
Despite these obstacles, there's also potential advantages from cross-sex friendships. According to Michael Monsour, author of Women and Men as Friends: Associations across the Life Span in the 21st Century, there are a couple of different benefits that are unique to cross-sex friendships. One advantage is that these kind of friends provide one another with other-sex companionship and insider perspectives on how members of the contrary intimacy think, feel, and behave. As a result of this, each member of the companionship better is aware of why people may take action the way they actually, or say the items they state. Cross-sex friendships are additionally beneficial in making later cross-sex relationships in life better to maintain (p. 7-8).
Valentines Day is a movie with a whole lot of main individuals in it. There are most likely about 10 different people in it, that your viewer eventually realizes are intertwined together by the end of the movie. Both people to concentrate on, however, are Reed (performed by Ashton Kutcher) and Julia (enjoyed by Jennifer Garner). Reed is in love with a girl known as Morley, and Julia is needs to land for a Dr. Harrison Copeland. Despite having relatively individual lives, with Reed as a florist and Julia as a schoolteacher, they are each other's close friends. Reed offers Julia advice on Dr. Copeland, and Julia tries to help Reed overcome his heart being cracked by Morley (who broke off their proposal early on in the movie). Both of these things go along with what are a few of the benefits associated with cross-sex relationships. With Reed being truly a male, he provides Julia insider information on what he feels she must do to amaze Dr. Copeland on Valentine's Day. He thought he was offering advice for Julia to surprise Dr. Copeland by going to go to him, because he would like it if his girl does that for him. This was all before Reed finds out that Dr. Copeland is wedded, and has a complete other life that he's keeping from Julia. Reed then attempts to avoid Julia at the airport, revealing to her what only a true good friend would say; the reality, because he'd have wished to know that Morley was going to leave him if anyone else acquired known.
This movie depicts an optimistic experience with cross-sex friendships. Reed and Julia have there been for one another when needed, and provided advice when needed. However, they did mix the "friendship lines" at the end of the movie, and it ended with each of them kissing, so that it is seem like they were going to begin a relationship. It is unknown if they acquired a happy closing in a romantic marriage, or if their a friendly relationship was ruined by it, because those are really the only real two options you have when moving past being best friends and into a romance. Two people hardly ever can return to being close friends due to challenges listed previously, especially the intimate challenge. There will always be a sexual pressure in the partnership after going further than being "just friends" rendering it increasingly difficult to go back to friendship you'd before.
Whether it is same-sex or cross-sex, friendships are a great form of communication and communal experience. They can be found in a multitude of ways in life, just travelling the halls of a school or going for a walk through a shopping center, one will likely visit a few different kinds of friendship. There is absolutely no friendship that is exactly the same, but most friendships have many similar characteristics. Someone is lucky to get someone they can call a genuine friend since it is the opportunity to share a part of yourself with someone you can always trust and count on.